a journey starting 20+ years too late

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I was divorced the 1st time in 1967 and later remarried, which also ended in divorce in 1989.

Those 2 marriages gave me 4 children, which was 2 sons from the 1st and a son and daughter from the 2nd.

After the 1st marriage ended I moved to another state and for some reason I basically abandoned my 2 sons, and today I can not give a reason for my actions in doing so. I have dwelled on what made me stay away from their lives when they were growing up and I guess I was just immature in not facing my responsibilities as a parent. I basically started a new life away from them.

If it wasn’t for my mother, I would never stayed up to date on what was going on in their life.

My oldest son got married and had 2 daughters, tragically his 1st marriage ended like mine in a divorce. He later remarried and had 3 more children, 1 son and 2 daughters.

To expand my effort to try and get in touch with my family I joined Facebook and found that my oldest granddaughter is there along with my oldest grandson.

Now the hard part begins, which means I have to contact them and let them know I am still alive and would like to communicate with them. My greatest fear is total rejection from them, but I hope that they have some desire to just get to find out how I am doing. I don’t expect instant reconciliation , just some communication as to how they are doing in their life today. My greatest fear of total rejection is greater than my passing from this earth.

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